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DVD Review: In The Woods (1999)

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In The Woods (1999)

Directed by Lynn Drzick

DVD Review: In The Woods (1999)In The Woods is a low-budget horror movie about a fire fighter who discovers something nasty in the woods and lives to regret it.

DJ Perry stars as the troubled fireman, Alex Kerwood, and the beginning of the film finds him pulling a mother and baby from a burning building. You would think that a seasoned fireman would be used to all manner of tragedies, but when they both die he is so disturbed by their deaths he heads straight for the local watering hole to drown his sorrows in alcohol.

In The Woods (1999)

When he arrives home late Alex’s wife Helen is surprisingly cool about it, but flies off the handle when she attempts to kiss him and smells the beer on his breath. It seems that Alex has a drink problem and Helen does not want to hear any more excuses. “Is this the way it’s going to be? You limping off to the water hole simply because you had a bad day? If you’d rather kiss a Corona than me just go for it.”  Their marriage is on the rocks and even though Alex promises to clean up his act he still has to spend the night on the couch.

With so much to worry about Alex decides to go on a hunting trip with his friend Wayne Higley. Guess where they go. You got it – the woods, and everything is fine until they reach a clearing and discover a makeshift grave. A serial killer is known to be active in the area, and Wayne fears that the grave may contain one of the killer’s victims, so he insists that he and Alex dig it up. Alex is not happy about this, but he lends a helping hand anyway and in no time at all the two men have unearthed a skull. The good news is that it’s not a human skull. The bad news is that they have unearthed something evil. It has been buried there for a long time and should have been left alone. Now they have awakened it and are soon running from the woods while something that the viewer cannot see gives chase.

In The Woods (1999)

Despite all his good intentions, and despite his promise to his wife, Alex  ends up kissing that cold Corona again and when Helen returns home and finds him drunk on the sofa she grabs her clothes and leaves. Alex soon has other things to worry about though; the thing from the woods has found him, it is killing people, and keeps on bringing him the body parts.

In The Woods (1999)

I have to say that In The Woods is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. The acting is so wooden that, if the entire cast had suddenly shot branches out of their asses, I would not have been surprised. Having said that, I must admit that it was almost worth suffering the film just for the scene where Alex and Helen are arguing. All of the woodenness is still there, but Helen has some of the strongest lines in the film. The one about kissing a Corona is a classic and she follows it up a little later with, “Don’t you understand that when you wash away the pain you’re also washing away me.”

But what about the special effects? All I can say is, “What special effects?” There is a little bit of smoke coming out of a skull, but that’s about it and the monsters, ugly as they are, are obviously just men in suits of rubber or hair.

In the Woods DVD

Buying & Rental Options

If I was giving marks out of ten I could only give In the Woods a four or a very generous five, but I realize that there are some people who love this kind of low-budget film so, if you are one of these people, In The Woods could be just what you are looking for, and if it all proves to be too much of a let down you could always try watching it with a cold Corona in your hand – kiss the bottle and kill the pain.

CAST

DJ Perry
Aimee Tenaglia
Tim Jeffrey
 Jim Greulich
Stuart MacDonald
Buck Schirner
Renee Pulse 
Jim Petersen
Rachel Walker

Matt Murdock 
John Hosek 
Richard Jewell 
Lane Glenn 
Todd Dunfield
Andy Campbell
Bradley Wilson 
Ed Halcomb

Mark S. Schroeder
Chad Randau
David Pulice
Carrie Ann Nagy 
Lesley Nagy
Michael Melik Brown 
Scott Osborn
Evelyn LaLonde
Terry Price

Andrew Bates
Matt 'Gus' Collins
Liz Michels
Larry Osterman
Kelli Smock
Michael Eichner
Cheo Ramey
Dan Waters
Don Blackport
Craig Dean

Larry D. Osterman II
Lisa M. Dickerson


Rhonda Davids
Steve Jones
David De Angelis
Benedetto Sorrentino
Doug Wassman
James McDuffy
Nancy Gideon
Ryan O'Malley
Lori MacDonald
Skyler Stone
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Alex Kerwood
Helen Kerwood
Larry Gorham
Wayne Higley
Al Fargo
Connor Pellman
Elizabeth Gorham
Police Officer
Pathologist

Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter 
Fire Fighter
Fire Fighter / Harley Rider

Pete
FBI  Agent #1
FBI  Agent #2
Bartender  #1
Bartender  #2
Gun Shop Clerk 
Serial Killer
Pet Counter Girl
Storage Man

Paramedic
Paramedic
Paramedic
Dick Jansen (TV Reporter)
Nurse
Doctor
Police Photographer
Police Extra
Police Extra / Bar Extra
Harley Rider

News Cameraman
Police Receptionist / Female Reporter

Burn Victim
Swordfighter
Swordfighter
Swordfighter
Bar Extra
Bar Extra
Bar Extra
Bar Extra
Bar Extra
Bar Extra

~Buying & Rental Options~

 

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